All good news! My babies are now a week old. Both babies were off CPAP after the first 3 days, which is stupendous!!! They are breathing on their own, and the IV's have been taken out and they are on a gavage of breast milk only. They are crying heartily, and are already gaining weight back. I couldn't ask for anything more at this stage. After reading a little of www.rastalesstraveled.com I'm even more appreciative, and her twins were born at 30 weeks! This gal is a trooper who has been through so much more than I have just to have her babies, and her baby boy was born sick with lung problems and is still on CPAP four months later and she is out of money and unable to leave India.
Cleaning ladies left the house spic and span this morning, and I am 95% ready to go to India. It was the best $90 I've spent in forever. I wanted to kiss both the cleaning ladies on the mouth when it was done despite them being covered in dust bunnies and smelling like lysol. The four large suitcases (2 carry on) are loaded and ready to burst at any minute. I managed to cram in everything I wanted except my DVD player and P90X which was just a luxury item probably not worth taking in the first place. I should have family coming in with diaper reinforcements since the 16 packs of 31 diapers each I have in the first bag will likely run out, and I have 15 more packs in a suitcase ready to go along with items we'll need later. I plan on paying through the nose for being over the baggage weight limit for the first time in my life. The nursery still has 3 walls that need painting and the living room has 2 walls....and with some luck on my side I'll get that done too.
We had a bad string of luck and the washer hose detached twice in 2 days and did some laminate damage due to 10 gallons of water spilling all over the place. I laughed it off despite the warped flooring next to the washer, thinking that everything in my life good or bad comes in two's now. But then we had a hot water pipe burst a day later, and my sense of humor disappeared and for a moment I did lose perespective and let my life overwhelm me. Frankly I just decided that I don't have the time or the inclination to deal with it right now, especially since the suspected pipe is not easy to get to. I'd rather save money for now and get my babies home. So we kicked the plumbers out who were charging $216 an hour, shut off the hot water, and my lovely husband will take cold showers until I get back. Insert joke here. But I'll be in a hotel in India living out of a suitcase, so this can be his way of showing solidarity with the trials I'll be enduring. And overall I've taken it as a lesson...two steps forward one step back is a lot like the NICU I'm told.
Baby shower is tomorrow! I am excited, but have been so busy I haven't had time to get really excited. I think this means tomorrow I will be really overwhelmed and emotional. I can't believe this many people are coming for us and I have such wonderful friend's hosting it. I never thought I would have something like this.
Since Tara broke the sac and was born first I'm thinking she may be an impatient little girl. Just like her Mommy. She'll just have to wait another 5 days! It feels like forever. It doesn't feel all that long until I leave, because I still have a short but time intensive list of things to do until then. But the journey will be long and starts on Monday at noon and ends on Wednesday on the other side of the planet after hours and hours of flying and layovers, including an all night layover in Mumbai. Same airport as last time. Will have 100 men staring at me again I'm sure. Uber creepy.
Now onto the trials of induced lactation. As soon as they were born and I rented the hospital breast pump (Medela Symphony), I've been pumping on an irregular schedule 8-10 times per day. I started off 4-5 times a day and built up, but with everything going on I can't schedule it every 3 hours like I would like to and at 2:30 am and 5:30 I press snooze a lot! I didn't expect much because I wasn't being consistent on times and am too rushed to worry about my diet and water intake just yet. I'm taking Alfafa and Blessed Thistle supplements, and chewing up Fennel and Fenugreek seeds three times a day. It is waaaaay cheaper to buy the latter two in the spice aisle and just chew them up. I ground up the Fenugreek seeds in my coffee grinder since they are pretty hard, and I would say the end result is good. Both spices taste fine, and in fact the fennel seed is commonly used as an after dinner mint in every Indian restaurant I've ever been to (mixed with a few sweet bits). I've had about four months of Domperidone instead of the recommended six, and will have pumped for 1 1/2 weeks before I see my babies instead of the recommended six.
But despite the inconsistency, left boob is getting the message and producing a few drops every pumping! Right boob however has not been getting with the program. It has produced a few drops, but the last few times nothing at all. Most women have one that is bigger than the other, and my right one is almost a full cup size larger. I expected more from you right boob! But tonight despite my massive production level of a 1/4 teaspoon, they started to hurt after a 5 hour gap in pumping since I had to work today. I considered this a good sign and finally got relief from my console to pump. I figured it out. Left boob is the laid back one and is cool with a 3-5 level of pressure. Right boob ain't listening until I'm at at least a 7. So either I pump them separately or put lefty in for a world of hurt. Yippie. Let's hope lefty toughens up or righty loosens up.
But I'm pleased that after only a week of pumping I have some results, and once I actually see and maybe hold my babies everything says the rest will happen naturally. I'm trying to relax and focus on my babies, but you can only stare at the sole 3 pictures you have for so long. 15 min 8-10 times a day it doesn't hold your attention the entire duration and give you the relaxing warm fuzzy you need. Especially when you are sleep deprived and stressed about everything you have to do to get ready! I trust that with this good of results this soon that in 3 weeks when I have time to sleep and be with my babies and eat and drink better and pump more consistently I will have something they can actually eat.
Showing posts with label nursery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nursery. Show all posts
Friday, August 3, 2012
Sunday, June 3, 2012
The Big Announcement
So we wait until week 13 to tell everyone, though close family already knew and everyone I worked with knew about the trip and could tell from the look on my face that it worked. So we just made the announcement via Facebook. 64 likes and 38 comments. A personal record!
Danielle Nowell Congratulations! So exciting! I am so happy for you. I was starting to wonder with all your pinterest pins of kids and baby things :).
Jaelyn Connally Whorton Emily, what wonderful news! Having gone through years of infertility myself and now having our baby boy on the way I can just feel your excitement of these wonderful blessings! Congratulations!
David Elliott congratulations!! I know you & Vinnie will make EXCELLENT parents! I'm very happy for both of y'all!! XXOO
Emily Scates Grover The 40 week mark is Oct 19th, but no way that will happen. I'm hoping for Vinnie's Birthday on Sept 29th myself. Hello flexible airfare dates!
Sheryl Kieffer I'm gonna wish for my son's bday of sept 30 or mine of October 17..haha anyway congrats!
Amber Pyeatt Congratulations to both of you! That is wonderful news and such a blessing!
Scott Horton Congrats!
Vidhu Kapadia Good luck and best wishes!! Twins... U might as well sleep nap enjoy hot coffee food now... Ain't Going to get much of that after they arrive
Marianna Seaton Congratulations, Emily and Vinnie. Please let me know how your friends at Horizon can help when you bring those babies home!!!
Sally Estes Wow, Emily! That is SO great! Will they be newborns, or is that really a picture of them?
Emily Scates Grover They will definitely be newborns, and with a little luck we'll be there at the birth. And bringing these babies home is an expensive proposition, so we could use ANY baby stuff you or anyone you know no longer needs! Thanks everyone for your wishes and support, and send all your prayers to our surrogate.
Roxanna Johnson An officer I work with just brought their adopted son home from Ethiopia so it's a long road but worth it.
Jorge Cruz Oh wow! You guys give a whole new meaning to the phrase "hitting the ground running!" Congratulations!
My Mom helps me get cracking on house renovations, and there is a lot to do there too. I store piles of large baby items in the guest room that just needs a coat of paint to be done. It looks like a baby store, and by the end of July it will be time to start spreading all the baby contraptions through the house, slap on some paint, install the car seats, and call ourselves ready!
Danielle Nowell Congratulations! So exciting! I am so happy for you. I was starting to wonder with all your pinterest pins of kids and baby things :). 
Jaelyn Connally Whorton Emily, what wonderful news! Having gone through years of infertility myself and now having our baby boy on the way I can just feel your excitement of these wonderful blessings! Congratulations! 
David Elliott congratulations!! I know you & Vinnie will make EXCELLENT parents! I'm very happy for both of y'all!! XXOO 
Emily Scates Grover The 40 week mark is Oct 19th, but no way that will happen. I'm hoping for Vinnie's Birthday on Sept 29th myself. Hello flexible airfare dates! 
Sheryl Kieffer I'm gonna wish for my son's bday of sept 30 or mine of October 17..haha anyway congrats! 
Amber Pyeatt Congratulations to both of you! That is wonderful news and such a blessing! Scott Horton Congrats! 
Vidhu Kapadia Good luck and best wishes!! Twins... U might as well sleep nap enjoy hot coffee food now... Ain't Going to get much of that after they arrive 
Marianna Seaton Congratulations, Emily and Vinnie. Please let me know how your friends at Horizon can help when you bring those babies home!!! Sally Estes Wow, Emily! That is SO great! Will they be newborns, or is that really a picture of them? 
Emily Scates Grover They will definitely be newborns, and with a little luck we'll be there at the birth. And bringing these babies home is an expensive proposition, so we could use ANY baby stuff you or anyone you know no longer needs! Thanks everyone for your wishes and support, and send all your prayers to our surrogate. Roxanna Johnson An officer I work with just brought their adopted son home from Ethiopia so it's a long road but worth it. 
Jorge Cruz Oh wow! You guys give a whole new meaning to the phrase "hitting the ground running!" Congratulations! 
It was beyond fun to finally be the one sharing such good news X 2! I knew that we would be spending a lot on the trip to India to pick up our babies, and the likelihood of NICU care meant even more money. So I got busy freecycling at http://www.freecycle.org/ and had a few very generous friends offer me their baby stuff. I knew you were supposed to wait until the end of the 2nd trimester to get ready, but I decided to not let superstition and caution guide me here and finally surrender to joy. Besides...there were a lot of baby items I would need and all I had so far was two cribs, a changing table, and a UC Berkeley tie-dye onesie and matching hat I had gotten on our first anniversary trip to San Francisco. The sooner I get started, the better.
I made up my registry list like a freecycle hit list, and checked so many things off the list that the house was full of baby stuff by the end of week 16! I totaled it up and after months of driving all over the metroplex I aquired $8000 worth of baby stuff for absolutely FREE! It is an accomplishment I am proud of, and I can't wait to donate back everything I got to two families that don't have anything once our kids outgrow it.
Amazing how much stuff is still left on the registries though...but Amazon and Walmart seem to have stuff for the cheapest prices so I went with them. So I get great advice from so many friends and learn how to get fantastic prices through the Amazon Mom membership/Diapers.com and good diapers for cheap will be delivered to my door for no shipping charges in bulk! Unfortunately baby clothes are VERY gender specific thanks to modern sonogram technology, so any little boy of mine might have to wear pink in India if I have trouble getting all the onesies I bring washed faster than they can urp on them. Oh well.
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| I'm not sure whether I shoud be concerned that Vinnie test drives every freecycled baby item I bring home with the dog first. But Ralph seems to enjoy the ride. |
I go to Home Depot and buy up paint for the entire house. I am painting it all by myself, though my Mom helped me out in the Kitchen/Den area. They are making a lot of money off me at that store!
Here is the nursery so far with my green on one and a half walls. I am almost done putting up an awesome willow tree rub on transfer wall decal that is 7 feet tall. It will look like a custom mural was painted when I'm done, but right now my arm hurts from many hours rubbing with a popsicle stick. http://www.tatouagedesigns.com/
I dyed the huge unhung canopy in the pic green after looking everywhere for a dye that worked on polyester. I may not be able to outdo the legendary nursery of Mariah Carey's twins, but a beautifully draped canopy will go a long way in completing my dream nursery.
I hate double shifts. I am getting tired of overtime at this point, and I need a vacation. Oh well. I sign up for as much overtime as I can get and religiously disinfect my shared work console so that I don't get sick and use up any of my paid sick time I'm conserving for FMLA leave. No vacation days for me. I don't get to be pregnant, and while that part does still suck but I am mostly over it and can look at the bright side of how hard I can push myself and how I won't have any recovery time from birth.
So I work hard with crazy hours. It would be easier if I just moved into the work break room. I can rest when the babies get here. Oh wait....no I can't. I won't care though, and all the hard work will finally be worth it. It doesn't stop me from complaining a bit, although I enjoy Mother's Day for the first time in years. It was "You're Not A Mother Day" to me for so many years and aside from a card/gift and quick phone call to my Mom and Mother-in-Law I would hide in my house in a dark room and felt sorry for myself. All those who suffer from infertility know what I'm talking about...Mother's Day is the worst day of the year, and Christmas and Thanksgiving are almost as hard.
Books. Lots of them. I learn that there is such a thing as "feeding philosophies." There are several extreme schools of thought, and I immerse myself in the literature partly to make myself into a better parent and partly because it is interesting and I have lots of time to read. I know not to read too many books and get overwhelmed and overworried, but it is hard not to do because every book gives you something new to think about or worry about if you let yourself. I select what I consider to be a small number to read, focusing on sleep & scheduling in twins because my Mothers of Multiples club all swears by it as the only way to maintain sanity and health with two babies.
I do okay until I attend my first La Leche League Meeting. I am planning on trying induced lactation. I meet a room full of attachment parents who don't know they are attachment parents. It is my own fault for going to a mid-week middle of the day meeting, which of course was all stay-at-home Mom's who weren't in that similar of a situation. Though admittedly I doubt I'll live long enough to meet another working woman who is in the same situation of having twins via surrogate in India and wants to do induced lactation. That really does throw a lot of folks when I tell them, but I do enjoy how interested they are and everyone asks so many questions because they are curious. I've always enjoyed educating people, and this topic is one most folks are not knowledgable about. I realize even though I don't get the attention that a pregnant woman gets, in some ways I get even more because my situation is so unique. And no strangers try to touch my belly or comment about my baby weight, so there is a silver lining there too.
I expected extremists to seem more extreme, but they are all so nice and supportive. But the message was that the baby will make everything you read worthless because nothing will work out as planned, and that it is perfectly normal to have a baby latched for hours for comfort alone and nothing else will work. They make reading books sound so naive and useless, and the baby will dictate everything and "tell you what to do." The gal I call "Zombie Mom" said she showed up looking like a zombie to her first LLL meeting after 4 days of no sleep, and it was all due to the evils of trying to do scheduled feedings. Something had to be wrong with this picture, but it scared the bejeebers out of me anyway. They all said "do whatever works for you" but then would contradict themselves without intending to.
It really did throw me for a loop, but I was scared I might never sleep again. I had my wonderful Mothers of Multiples club and a few friends talk me down from the ledge, and I realize I've had my first round of "too much advice" that is common to new mothers. I'm now part of that club after all. But LLL is a valuable resource for many and others have had a much better experience, but for me I decide to borrow some really good books on breastfeeding they loan me that are custom to my concerns about prematurity, twins, and "Defining Your Own Success" when you may not produce a full supply. And if breastfeeding is truly so hard that you need to hire a "lactation consultant" to do it then I'll use them for recommendations. Though I doubt they will know any that will skype with me in the middle of the night while I'm in the middle of the day in India. I'm thinking it is a better plan to learn how to say "help" in Gujarati to the NICU nurse and hope she manhandles me and shows me how to ensure a good latch.
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